Hospital Slang Dictionary, Second Installment

BBOB: Big baby on board. We're not sure this one's coming out vaginally, everything's ready for any number of stickier scenarios.

Decision-to-Incision: (I'm not sure if every hospital has this or just mine.) Refers to the amount of time between deciding to do an urgent C-section and the first cut into the abdomen. The goal is under thirty minutes, and this is the bane of my existence! There are about a zillion tasks to do in this time: explaining the need for a C-section to the patient, gearing up with scrub cap and mask, shaving the patient, inserting a catheter, applying sequential compression devices to her feet to prevent blood clots, positioning her and securing her to the operating table, getting fetal heart rates every five minutes, surgical counts, prepping her abdomen with Betadine, charting, tying up the surgeons' gowns, getting anesthesia to dose up the epidural, preparing the father of the baby, hooking up suction and bovie... all the surgeons have to do is scrub.

Code brown: A poop incident

PRN: As needed, in reference to medications and staffing. Some people think this is short for "Per RN" as in, it's up to the nurse's discretion to decide to administer something. Really, the phrase comes from the more interesting Latin "Pro re nata" which translates to "for the thing born."

SOL: Shit outta luck.

Wheelchair sign: We use a bunch of different diagnostic methods to determine if someone broke their water or not. (It's not always a gallon of fluid like on TV.) There are nitrazine swabs, ferning slides, and pooling speculum exams. Positive wheelchair sign means that there's a puddle on the chair.